Although there is generally a move towards finding ways to have birth partners stay during all of the induction process, the reality is that in some areas women spend some of the time during induction on their own at night. This is usually the case early on in the process, generally by the time you’re in established labour you would be together.
Why is it beneficial to be together?
I want to talk about why it’s beneficial to be together, this may seen fairly obvious in some ways, just your partners presence usually makes you feel safer and more comfortable, but understanding why it’s useful is a good first step in finding ways to cope without them.
The main point comes down to oxytocin, this is the most important hormone of birth, it’s what keeps those contractions coming and it also makes you feel good, which is important in labour.
Often further into the induction processs a synthetic oxytocin drip is used (pitocin, syntocin, syntocinon), which helps create contractions, but doesn’t give you the feel good that your own oxytocin does. So boosting your own oxytocin is really important, in the early stages this can also help get things going.
The time women are usually on their own is during the pessary stage (cervadil, propess, prostin etc), when a prostaglandin is applied to encourage your cervix to ripen, or your body to start getting ready for labour. For some mums this can start things off pretty quickly, for others it can take quite a while.
When you’re with your birth partner, whether that’s your husband, partner, mums, sister etc. it’s usually someone that cares about your deeply and you feel love for. The benefit of this is that it can help increase your oxytocin level, some people call oxytocin the love hormone, because it gives us that loving feeling, which encourages your body to release more of the same hormone that we need for our labours to continue.
And having your birth partner there gives you the familiarity and the feeling of safety that is needed for oxytocin to flow.
Some women may have a doula as a birth partner, whilst you may not have a longterm relationship with them, you would normally have built up a relationship during pregnancy with them, and their knowledge and the continuity of care they provide can have a similar impact.
So what can I do when they’ve been sent home?
If you find yourself in this situation, you need some oxytocin boosters, here are some really simple things you can do to help:
- If your birth partner is your other half, get them to leave their hoody/jumper/scarf etc behind, if it smells a little like their aftershave/perfume then even better as that will give you a boost and remind you of them.
- Make your room / area more home-like using a blanket from home. If you’re sitting on a birth ball leaning on the bed, pop it on the bed to lean on, or just snuggle up under it if you’re having a sleep
- Having some oxytocin boosting photos helps too – maybe a wedding photo, or a photo of you and your partner on a holiday or a special place for you, something that reminds you of them and that feeling of love.
- If you’ve been practicing hypnobirthing with your partner, having them record a short relaxation for you, or some of your favourite birth affirmation; perhaps something you have been given from class to practice, that you can listen to in earphones can help too.
Once you’re in active labour your partner should be able to come back and join you, from this moment on you should be together until baby arrives. As I mentioned above, some hospitals have space for partners to stay and also offer out-patient induction so that mums can go home during the early stages, so it’s worth asking your midwife or consultant what options you have locally.
Do you know what your local hospital policy is? Is out-patient induction an option (when you get to go home during the early stages of induction)? Or can your partner stay with you overnight?
{Need more tips and tool for your induction? Take our online course: Your Positive Induction}